Things You Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery:
– Oops!
– Has anyone seen my watch?
– That was some party last night. I can’t remember when I’ve been that drunk.
– Damn! Page 47 of the manual is missing!
– Well, this book doesn’t say that… What edition is your manual?
– OK, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature.
– Better save that. We’ll need it for the autopsy.
– Come back with that! Bad Dog!
– Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what’s that?
– Hand me that…uh…that uh…..thingie.
– If I can just remember how they did this on ER last week.
– Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?
– Damn, there go the lights again…
– Ya know, there’s big money in kidneys. Hell, the guy’s got two of ’em.
– Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!
– Could you stop that thing from beating; it’s throwing my concentration off.
– I wish I hadn’t forgotten my glasses.
– Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us.
– Steril, shcmeril. The floor’s clean, right?
– What do you mean he wasn’t in for a sex change?
– What do you mean, he’s not insured?
– This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?
– Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?
– Don’t worry. I think it is sharp enough.
– What do you mean “You want a divorce”!
– I don’t know what it is, but hurry up and pack it in ice.
– Let’s hurry, I don’t want to miss “Bay Watch”.
– That laughing gas stuff is pretty cool. Can I have some more of that?
– Hey Charlie, unzip the bag on that one, he’s still moving.
– Did the doctor know he would look like that afterwards?
– Of course I’ve performed this operation before, Nurse!
– FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out!
