Mindblown: a blog about philosophy.
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The airline company was…
The airline company was disturbed over a high percentage of accidents and decided to eliminate the possibility of human errors by building a completely automated aircraft. “Ladies and gentlemen,” came a voice ove the loudspeaker on the plane’s maiden voyage, “it may interest you to know that you are flying on the first, fully automated…
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My arm started to…
My arm started to hurt me so I asked a doctor to examine it. She looked at my arm and brought out a medical book and studies it for about 10 minutes. Then she said to me, “Have you ever had that pain before?”I nodded yes. “Well, you’ve got it again. “
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Professor: If there are…
Professor: If there are any idiots in the classroom, please stand up. There was a long pause, then a lone freshman stood up in the back. Professor: So you consider yourself an idiot?Freshman: Well, not exactly. I just hated seeing you being the only one standing.
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A man sought medical…
A man sought medical aid because he had popped eyes and a ringing in his ears. A doctor looked him over and suggested removal of his tonsils. The operation resulted in no improvement, so the patient consulted another doctor who suggested removal of his teeth. The teeth were pulled, but still, his eyes kept popping…
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A blonde lived on…
A blonde lived on a farm. He didn’t get many visitors, so I went to see him. . . when I got there, he was standing stiff as a board, out in the middle of the cow paddock. I yelled out to him, and asked what he was doing standing out there all still and…
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Young Father O’Reilly, newly…
Young Father O’Reilly, newly ordained, was to hear his first confessions. Anxious to get his ministry off on the right foot, he asked the experienced Father McMartin to sit in and critique his handling of the assignment. At the end of the day the two clergymen sat in the rectory and reviewed O’Reilly’s performance. “Not…
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While cruising at nearly…
While cruising at nearly forty thousand feet, the airplane shuddered and Mr. Benson looked out the window. “My gosh!” he screamed, “one of the engines just blew up!”Other passengers left their seats and cam running over; suddenly the aircraft was rocked by a second blast as yet another engine exploded on the other side. The…
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A speaker was having…
A speaker was having a little trouble getting started in his speech. All of the sudden someone from the audience shouted: “Tell ’em everything you know. It will only take a mintue. “”I’ll tell e’m what we both know,” shot back the speaker. “It won’t take any longer. “
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Two lawyers walking through…
Two lawyers walking through the woods spotted a vicious-looking bear. The first lawyer immediately opened his briefcase, pulled out a pair of sneakers and started putting them on. The second lawyer looked at him and said, “Are you crazy? You’ll never be able to outrun that bear!””I don’t have to,” the first lawyer replied. “I…
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A panda walks into…
A panda walks into a bar, sits down and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the bartender shouts, “Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn’t pay for your sandwich!” The panda yells…
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