Category: Miscellaneous

There was a man sitting in a bar drinking a beer when a truckie came in and drank it all. The guy burst into tears.”It was only a joke, I’ll get you another one” said the truckie.”That’s not it,see I went to work and got fired, then I went to the parking lot and my…

Why do women have smaller feet than men? So they can stand closer to the kitchen sink.

Tonto and the Lone Ranger were lost one day. The Lone Ranger says to Tonto, ‘Use your Indian instincts and get us out of this mess.’Tonto bends down and put his ear to the ground. He turns and says to the Lone Ranger, ‘Buffalo come.’ The Lone Ranger says to Tonto ‘How do you know?’…

Six guys are playing poker when Bill loses $500 on one hand, clutches his chest and falls over dead. Who’s going to tell his wife, they all wonder. They draw straws and Bob picks the short one. They tell him to break it to her gently. “No Problem,” Bob says. So he drives over to…

There was a guy who walked into a bar and said to the bartender, “I’ll bet you a beer that I can bite my left eye.” And the bartender said, Well, nobody can bite their own eye! Sure.” So the man took out a glass eye and bit it. So he got his free beer…

A blonde tried to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems selling it, because the car had 250,000 miles on it. One day, she spoke about her problem with a brunette she worked with at a salon. The brunette told her, “There is a possibility to make the car easier to…

A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a Family in Egypt and is named “Amal.” The other goes to a family in Spain; They name him “Juan.” Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that…

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which is the other possiblity. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty’s Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known…

A man sitting at a bar was really drunk when he decided he had to use the restoom.He stubbled off to restroom a few seconds later.After some time had passed the bartender heard this horrifing scream.Since the other customers were starting to leave because of the noice the bartender went back to see what the…

There were three women speeding dowm a country road. One was a brunette, another a redhead, and the third a blonde. A cop saw them speeding and put on his siren. The three girls pulled over, got out of the car and each climbed up a different tree to hide.The cop pulled over and tried…