Category: Miscellaneous

Kids in the back seat cause accidents. Accidents in the back seat cause kids.

A man hasn’t been feeling well, so he goes to his doctor for a complete checkup. Afterward the doctor comes out with the results. “I’m afraid I have some very bad news,” the doctor says. “You’re dying, and you don’t have much time left.” “Oh, that’s terrible!” says the man. “How long have I got?”…

A cowboy is riding across the plains of the old west, when he is captured by Indians. The tribe puts him on trial for crimes against the Indian Nation, and he is found guilty. “You have been sentenced to death,” said the Chief, “but, as is our custom, you have three wishes to make as…

Q: How do you drown a blonde?A: You put a scratch ‘n sniff sticker on the bottom of the pool.

A man went to an eye specialist to get his eyes tested and asked, “Doctor, will I be able to read after wearing glasses?” “Yes, of course,” said the doctor, “why not!” “Oh! How nice it would be ,” said the patient with joy, “I’ve been illiterate for so long.”

Two attorneys went into a diner and ordered two drinks. Then they produced sandwiches from their briefcases and started to eat.The owner became quite concerned and marched over and told them, “You can’t eat your own sandwiches in here!”The attorneys looked at each other, shrugged their shoulders and then exchanged sandwiches.

There was a man who woke up one morning with a red ring around his member. Astonished he panicked and hurried to the emergency room.The Doctor looked at it and gave the man some lotion to rub on it twice a day, if no results come back tomorrow. This went on for three days when…

It was a stifling hot day and a man fainted in the middle of a busy intersection. Traffic quickly piled up in all directions, so a woman rushed to help him. When she knelt down to loosen his collar, a man emerged from the crowd, pushed her aside, and said, “It’s all right, I’ve had…

I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around singing “Happy Birthday”.

Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?