Category: Military

A man was driving down the road with twenty penguins in the back seat. The police stop him and say that he can’t drive around with the penguins in the car and should take them to the zoo. The man agrees and drives off. The next day the same man is driving down the road…

Before going to Europe on business, a man drove his Rolls-Royce to a downtown New York City bank and went in to ask for an immediate loan of $5,000. The loan officer, taken aback, requested collateral and so the man said, “Well then, here are the keys to my Rolls-Royce.” The loan officer promptly had…

The lookout aboard a clipper ship spots a pirate ship approaching, and yells down to the captain. The captain orders the bosun to bring his red shirt. The captain puts on his red shirt, and successfully leads his crew in fighting off the pirates. The next day, the lookout spots TWO pirate ships approaching. He…

It was World War II, and the captain was attempting to rally the GIs on the eve of a big offensive. “Out there is your enemy,” said the captain. “The man who has made your life miserable all these weeks, who has been working to destroy you since you came here; the man who has…

There was an Englishman,Scottishman and an Irishman swimming in the sea one day when suddenly they were captured by pirates. The captain said to them “You’re getting locked up in dungeons for 50 years, but I’ll give you something to go in with. The Englishman says he wants to go in with booze, so he…

There was a blonde sitting on a plane in first class seats with an economy class ticket. The flight attendant asked to check her ticket.’Excuse me’ she said ‘you only have an economy class ticket but you are sitting in first class. Could you please move to your allocated seat.’The blonde was very stubborn and…

This guy goes to sit at his plane seat in first class, and finds a blonde there. He says, excuse me miss, but this is my seat. She replies, I’m blonde, I’m beautiful, I have a great body and I’m going to Florida. So the guy calls the stewardess over to help him. He explains…

An airline captain was helping a new blonde flight attendant prepare for her first overnight trip. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the flight attendant the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight. The next morning as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day’s route, he noticed the new…