Category: Heaven and Hell

The lawyer is standing at the gate to Heaven and St. Peter is listing his sins:1) Defending a large corporation in a pollution suit where he knew they were guilty.2) Defending an obviously guilty murderer because the fee was high.3) Overcharging fees to many clients.4) Prosecuting an innocent woman because a scapegoat was needed in…

There was once a young lawyer, age 29, who was on his way to work when he was hit by a bus. He goes to heaven and meet’s St. Peter and pleads, “I am much to young to die, there must be a mistake!”. St. Peter thinks about this for a moment and goes out…

The following are a sampling of REAL answers received on exams given by the California Department of Transportation’s driving school Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road? A: What for? He can’t see my license plate. Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop…

One day, two guys decide to take a drive to a local grocery store to get some lunch. On the way to the store they come to an intersection with a stoplight. The light showed red. The man driving went right through the red light. The passenger looked at the driver and screamed, “What the…

Jesus came to Moses in heaven one day & said, “We’ve got to do something about this golf thing. No one goes to church any more.” “What should we do,” Moses asked. “In order to combat this, we’ve got to know what it is,” Jesus said. “Meet me at the golf course tomorrow morning.” Next…

There was this Christian lady that had to do a lot of traveling for her business so she did a lot of flying.But flying made her nervous so she always took her Bible along with her to read and it helped relax her. One time she was sitting next to a man.When he saw her…

The phone rings at FBI headquarters. “Hello?””My neighbor John Smith is an enemy of the State. He is hiding undeclared diamonds in his woodshed. “”We’ll take notice of this. “The next day, the FBI goes to Smith’s house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept, break every piece of wood, find no diamonds,…

Pilot: Pilot to tower. . . pilot to tower. . . I am 300 miles from land. . . 600 feet high and running out of gas. . . please instruct. . . over. Tower: Tower to pilot. . . tower to pilot. . . Repeat after me. . . “Our Father, which art in…

The prominent middle-aged attorney was walking in the woods when he heard a booming voice from above say, “You are going to live to be 100. ” That must be God speaking, the attorney thought. Immediately he began doing good deeds, figuring out that he now had ample time to make amends in order to…

It’s Saturday morning and John’s just about to set off on a round of golf when he realizes that he forgot to tell his wife that the guy who fixes the washing machine is coming around at noon. So John heads back to the clubhouse and phones home. “Hello?” says the little girl’s voice. “Hi,…