Computer Terms 486 -…

Computer Terms 486 – The average IQ needed to understand a PC. State-of-the-art – Any computer you can’t afford. Obsolete – Any computer you own. Microsecond – The time it takes for your state-of-the-art computer to become obsolete. G3 – Apple’s new Macs that make you say “Gee, three times faster than the computer I bought for the same price a Microsecond ago.” Syntax Error – Walking into a computer store and saying, “Hi, I want to buy a computer and money is no object.” Hard Drive – The sales technique employed by computer salesmen, esp. after a Syntax Error. GUI – What your computer becomes after spilling your coffee on it. (pronounced “gooey”) Keyboard – The standard way to generate computer errors. Mouse – An advanced input device to make computer errors easier to generate. Floppy – The state of your wallet after purchasing a computer. Portable Computer – A device invented to force businessmen to work at home, on vacation, and on business trips. Disk Crash – A typical computer response to any critical deadline. Power User – Anyone who can format a disk from DOS. System Update – A quick method of trashing ALL of your software.